The Car from Sixteen Candles

I know, the car doesn't exactly scream masculinity. But it's the Porsche 944 from Sixteen Candles, an 80's teen flick classic. I chose to write about it because I realized I hadn't included any European cars other than the VW bus. These Porsches are amongst the most reliable of sports cars. As a brand, they always have been. I've seen many of these with well over 100,000 miles still going strong.

Power is dervived from a 4 cylinder motor with a turbo charger making around 200 horsepower. That may seem like a low number but in a light car like this that's more than enough to play with and have fun with.

Plus, girls love little red sports cars. There's just something about them that they find irresistable. And buying a used one of these won't break the bank either. Even with high mileage cars all you have to do is change the turbo belts, timing belts and make sure you have a good water pump. They'll run forever. You can find a nice 85 944 for between 2 and 6 grand. Not bad if you have the budget for a summer car or live somewhere without winter.

The Truck That Almost Made Me Need Back Surgery

This attempt at a pickup truck by Honda proved to be extremely painful for me. The truck is known as the Honda Ridgeline. Or Back Breaker as I refer to it. My dad's girlfriend at the time purchased one of these before we went on vacation to South Carolina. I was stuck in the backseat. I didn't call shotgun in time. The backseats are jumpseats in this vehicle. That means they just fold down and have no support from the bottom. After the drive I was certain that two of my vertebrae had fused and moved sideways. It was cramped in the backseat and I had no legroom at all. It was torture.

However, the car actually did have a few positives. For only a five foot long pickup bed it was actually quite spacious for luggage. The car also had a lockable in-bed trunk compartment. It runs almost the whole length of the bed and you can fit double the amount of stuff into it.

The rest of the truck also isn't nearly as bad as the backseat. For having only a four cylinder motor it had a surprising amount of pep. I still would choose a Ford or a Chevy truck of course.

Small Car, Big Power

You might recognize this little red beauty if you saw the first film in The Fast & The Furious series. It's the car that Vin Diesel drives. How he fit in the car is still a mystery. The car is a Mazda RX-7 This car stands out for a few reasons. First, it's one of the rare Japanese cars I absolutely would love to own. Also even without an outrageous bodykit it has enough style and personality to turn heads. The main thing that makes it unique though is the type of engine it uses. The car has a 1.3 liter rotary engine. That differs from the normal internal combustion engine. It uses a different motion to make much more power. My car has a motor 4.4 liters bigger but the power made is just the same.

The completely scary thing about this car is how much power can be added with bolt on modifications. Or, in some cases the engine can be replaced by the same 5.7 liter V-8 that's in my car. The equation is simple: Small and light car plus much larger engine equals a car that can easily do 160 mph out of the box with no power additives!

However, these cars are rare and hard to find. Only a few thousand were imported in the early 90's. Plus they are extremely popular cars for illegal street racing. I don't condone street racing under any situation. I just respect the cars for what they are and what they can do. The cheapest one I've ever seen for sale was $12,000 with over 100,000 miles. They are extremely collectible and seeing one on the street is a rare gem.

My Top 5 Songs To Speed To.

Speeding. Every driver's guilty pleasure. We all do it sometimes. Whether just to get around a large truck we're uncomfortable following or just for the pure fun of it. This is best punctuated by music. Here are my favorite selections from 5 to 1.

5. Radar Love by Golden Earring. This one, as they say is an oldie but a goodie. The theme is easily understood to anybody that ever had to drive a long distance at night. The man in the song is taking a drive at 4:30am to meet up with his girlfriend and is in a hurry to get there. At that hour, usually it's just you and the road. So hammer down.

4. Turn The Page by either Metallica or Bob Seger (depending on mood. Mostly....you can't go wrong with Seger.) This song best personifies the frustration that can sometimes come with driving. During a long drive at times you would give anything just for it to be over. When that happens you surrender to that message from your brain and throttle up.

3. Demon Speeding by Rob Zombie. This is a much heavier selection. You have to be in the right mood. But the opening guitar that hits you with such force is the perfect compliment to mashing the pedal. Plus, the with a title and a chorus like that, you get the general idea.

2. Breaking The Law by Judas Priest. Speeding is breaking the law. Need I say more? Plus with Glen Tipton and KK Downing doing one of the fiercest guitar solos ever in such a short song you have a winner.

1. Jet City Woman by Queensryche. I chose this one because it's one of my all time favorite songs from my all time favorite band. The opening verse brings such an anticipation. Nothing beats when everything drops out and the chorus kicks in with more intensity than you expect. Much like Golden Earring's song it's about a guy desperate to get to his girl. Most of us can relate to that too.  

The Bird In Sheep's Clothing

The car pictured above is a 1995 Ford Thunderbird Supercoupe. With such flat and plain styling you'd probably just skip over the this car with just a cursory glance. Gone is the abundance of chrome from the Thunderbirds of old. This one also doesn't have humongous rabbit ear fins to make it stand out in a crowd. Such a boxy shape might just flat out bore you.

But looks aren't everything. There is something about this car that makes it the ultimate sleeper car. A sleeper is a fast car that doesn't go out of the way to advertise how fast it is. The only way you find out is by trying to keep up with one. That something in particular is a supercharged 3.8 V-6 motor. Granted, it is a V-6 but as you can imagine the supercharger makes it quite a bit more thirsty for fuel.

There is also another factor. You can't rightly expect to see what the outside of your car looks like while behind the wheel. You have a very different view than the people outside the car. That driverseat perspective is enough to make people rethink this vehicle. The interior is lavishly appointed for a 90's GM vehicle. Leather seats, woodgrain trim on the dash and a level of fit and finish not usually seen in vehicles of that era. My friend has a 1990 model. Same styling and interior. The exterior of the car is silver while the seats inside are a deep maroon. It gives a nice contrast and only improves the driving experience.

Maybe the car still would not interest the casual fan. But that's ok. It stands up and makes you take notice. Once you hear that supercharger whine and see a late model Thunderbird go flying by you down the highway you can't help but take notice.

A Completely Irrational Obsession

Not every car has to be blistering fast. There are some cars that stick in your mind like the lyrics to a familiar song. For me, a vehicle that I've always appreciated and to this day have no idea why is the Volkswagon Microbus.

I know what you're thinking: Why in the world would you like that car? It looks like some strange mix of a van, bus, ice cream truck and hot dog vending vehicle. It's not a fast vehicle by any means. A four or six cyliner motor in a substantially heavy thing isn't going to be.

But for some reason the car has such personality and stands out in a crowd. It conjures mental images  of a slow and easy roadtrip with no particular destination in mind. The car is the personification of the word Chill. Also, there is no better vehicle that looks more at home on a beach than this one.

Now don't get me wrong; I'm not going to be trading in my Firebird for one of these. But the VW Bus will always fall into that category of Cars I Always Wanted But Never Had The Guts To Buy. Maybe one day when I have a car collection I'll bring one of these into the fold. But until then.....we can dream, can't we?

Car Cruises

I decided to deviate a little bit from the standard format and talk about something in a related field. I'm talking about one of the more pleasant automobile-related experiences: the car cruise.

A car cruise offers something for everybody. Sometimes just being around the older cars and 50's music can bring feelings of nostalgia to those around during that time. Likewise, the atmosphere makes younger people wonder what it would have been like to live in such an era where the cars had such personality. I admit, the main thing I enjoy the most about going to car cruises is the music. It may sound strange that a 21 year old kid would enjoy music dating all the way back to 1953. But I do anyway. Bands like Jimmy Beaumont and the Skyliners, Little Anthony and the Imperials and Bobby Darin are your standard car cruise fare.

Car cruises also seem to attract alot of fans of the film Grease. For obvious reasons. Though it was filmed in the late 70's it was an effective period piece that really brought the 50's and early 60's to life. So too does the iconic film American Graffitti, one of my all time favorites.

It's also interesting to see how the car cruise is ever changing and evolving. They are open to any and all collectible vehicles. Nobody ever gets shunned for driving up in a tuned and customized Mitsubishi Eclipse. Instead, they are embraced as any other showgoer.

I realize that car cruises do not appeal to everyone. It helps to have an ear for 50's music and you have to have at least some appreciation for cars to understand. But sometimes the conversations and connections you make with people at the show make the experience worthwhile. It's a great feeling to see somebody at the first show of the year that you spoke with at the last show the year before. They greet you like an old, long lost friend. As usual, this is just my humble opinion. But it is one of my favorite hobbies.

Total Eclipse of the Point

This spry yellow car is the 2011 Mitsubishi Eclipse. This car is really cool!........if you happen to be 17. For anybody else in the know, it's a joke wrapped in sheetmetal. The car goes out of it's way to badge itself as a  GT. It has a large V-6 motor in it with no assist from turbochargers. The powerplant actually isn't terrible. But the effect is lost in such a heavy car.

I'm no expert, but I wonder why the heaviest part of the car seems to be the door. I have no idea why the door panel and metal is so thick and dense. I thought maybe it was just one faulty car at the autoshow. It was a problem the entire Mitsubishi booth seemed to share.

Style-wise the car just doesn't do it for me. It's too round and much too heavy looking. The cheap plastic treatment on the grille doesn't help matters either. And the wing on the back is ridiculous. It's not a space ship. And unless the wing is aerodynamically proven to provide downforce it just creates drag. Drag on a sports car like this means more wind resistance and slower speeds.

Cost is another issue. For around 26 grand at the same price you can get a Mustang GT or Camaro V-6. Both cars  have around 40 more horsepower. The Camaro especially trumpts the Eclipse because it has the same number of cylinders and does more with them.

Historically, there is one more reason Americans should object to buying ANYTHING from Mitsubishi. Remember that little dustup known as World War II? Well, it just so happens that Mitsubishi built the A-6 M Zero Fighter Plane. There's just one itsy bitsy little problem: That plane was used by the Japanese......to attack Pearl Harbor. I'm all for forgiving and forgetting but if they're going to sell us something made by a company that took American lives they could at least give us a quality car. Again, this is all just my humble opinion.

Too Many Mustangs

Sure, they look great and they are also pretty dang fast. But if you buy a Mustang GT you run the risk of being just another run of the mill cars on the street. The problem with the Ford Mustang lies in it's popularity. Seems like a weird thing to complain about. But hear me out. You just went out and dropped 25 grand on a new Mustang GT. Chances are you'll run into another GT of the same body style on the way back from the dealsership. Part of buying a muscle car is that you're supposed to feel special. In a Mustang, you feel like a kid that went out and bought the latest fashion fad and started wearing it months after everybody else. Granted, having a sense of community with other people that have the same model car is a good thing. But I personally prefer seeing another Trans Am every now and then as opposed to seeing one once every 25 minutes. Ford just doesn't do enough with paint, trim, body paneling or engine size variation to make one Mustang stand out from the crowd. It can still be done. But it usually takes alot more money and cosmetic things like hoodscoops that don't make that small 4.6 liter V-8 any faster. Ok, so maybe I'm a little biased being that I'm a GM guy. I'd rather have somebody roll up in a Mustang than some absurb Subaru WRX with a giant wing on it anyday. 

My Cross er.....Chrysler to Bear

For this blog I will focus on my personal hell that is the 2006 Chrysler Pacifica suv. This car has led to numerous profanity-laced diatribes from me. I hate this vehicle for several reasons. First off, it was a mistake for my family to purchase. There are two total people in my household. The vehicle has seven seats. Do the math, it doesn't add up. Appearance wise it's actually not bad for a vehicle of that sort. The positives however, end there. In spite of all wheel drive the thing still rides like a wooden rollercoaster. The tire quality from the factory is poor. Poor is being charitable to describe tire quality. They go flat after limited usage. The vehicle eats tires like a fatkid eats cupcakes. Any day that I'm forced to take the Chrysler I mourn. For those consumers that knock American cars this car makes an excellent target. It's too big to miss!

The car has 42000 miles. My Pontiac has 73000 yet is in much better shape. Six buttons in the Chrysler have had the neon already burn out in them for no discernible reason. It also surprises me with idiotic warning lights. For example, that says "gascap" even though the gascap is screwed on correctly. Also the neon text in this car is hard to read. I thought it said "sarsgaurd." What that means, I have no idea. The radio for some reason picks up the space between stations better than it does the actual stations. One must crank the volume to even hear the music.

Personally, the only reason I hate it stems from one incident. I had just spent four unsuccessful hours at a girlfriend's house. She invited me back to her house to watch Jaws. We ACTUALLY WATCHED JAWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So yeah, I was a bit upset. On the way home at 4 am, the Chrysler recieved a flat tire. The spare tire mechanism is an engineering nightmare. One must lower the tire by rotating a bolt. Endlessly. And it doesn't turn easily for a skinny fellow like me. I've had it out for the Chrysler ever since. Now, as far as cars go, I'm sure it could be worse. It could have engine problems or I could have to suffer the indignity of driving a Subaru. *Shudder.*

Low Price Performance

If you're looking for a reasonably priced sports car, look no further than the GM F-Body Chevrolet Camaros and Pontiac Trans Ams. My 93 is pictured above.   This bodystyle ran from the 1993-2002 model years. We will only focus on the V-8 powered models for the purpose of this entry. From 93-97 the engine of choice was the LT-1. In 98-02 it came with a higher horsepower LS-1. I offer these models as an example because they are fast cars that can be found for decent prices used. They also tend to have lower miles. Plus for the money, you can't beat the engine size and performance. For example, the Mustangs between 93 and 98 had a 5.0 liter V-8. In 99 to 02 they had a smaller but faster 4.6. The Camaro and the Trans Am always had larger 5.7 liter motors. A decent Trans Am or Camaro with around 80k miles can be found for around 6 to 7 grand. I always preferred these over the Mustang. I respect the Mustang but it seems like almost everybody has one. Also alot more has to spent on performance parts just to bring the Mustang near the stock performance level of something like the Trans AM. These vehicles are great bases for tuner applications. With just a few mods you can have a car putting out at least 300 horses. I have seen Trans Ams used as the canvas for some truly scary performance monsters. I'm probably a little biased because I drive one of these daily. This is just my opinion and I thank you for reading it.

The Kia Forte Koup- a waste of sheetmetal.

This little plastic nightmare from Korea isn't even original. They completely ripped off the design from a Honda Civic. They also failed to spell the word "coupe" correctly. I understand that there is a desire to be different from the group. But to make it appear like a 3 year old came up with the name of your new vehicle isn't a good idea. Not to mention, who exactly would this vehicle appeal to? Attempting to market it as a sport compact would not be a wise decision. There are plenty of other, more attractive vehicles out there with better motors and styling. Why anybody would buy a Kia Forte instead of a Civic SI or a Golf is beyond me. Then again, I suppose generic styling, plastic body panels and poor paint choices are what we've come to expect from such a high quality automaker like Kia.